border adventure!

I had the most exhausting and ridiculous dream last night. I dreamed that, with Curly Sue and another real-life friend, I was going to try to sneak across the U.S.-Mexico border by rafting across the river. At no point was it clear whether we were trying to get from Mexico to the U.S. or from the U.S. to Mexico, or even why we were crossing clandestinely (a lot of things in this dream weren't clear).

At the beginning, I was trying to pack my things to go. I had it in my head that I needed to fit everything necessary for 8 months or so into a small backpack, besides my share of the necessary stuff for the trip itself--tent, blow-up raft, life jacket, food, etc. All my possessions were disorganized and all over the floor of a room in my parents' house (different than my parents' house in real life). I was preparing for an academic year in a dorm atmosphere, so I was thinking about what I would need in that situation and including all kinds of not-strictly-necessary things like a tin of colored drawing pencils. I was also concerned about the mess I would be leaving behind, all the disorganized stuff that I wouldn't be taking with me.

After this packing stress went on for a while (forever, seemingly), I finally realized that this was just a trip to Establish a Presence, and that I was going to be able to retrieve more belongings later (what?), not to mention that wherever I was going was bound to have stores to buy things in. So this threw off my whole strategy and I had to start all over. By this time my traveling companions were pretty much ready to go, so knowing that I was holding them up added to the stress.

I ended up finally just throwing a change of clothes and what I thought was my share of the supplies into my bag, and we got ready to go through the security checkpoint (what? again). This was manned by U.S. agents, although, again, I'm not sure where we were leaving and where we were entering, or why (even better question) we were going through security and THEN sneaking over the border. The security procedure was onerous and there were lots of annoying, noisy kids running around underfoot.

We finally made it through, and then I realized that the river looked pretty wide, deep, and fast, and that I hadn't actually packed my life jacket. At this point, I think my companions' patience was running quite thin, especially after the whole security-checkpoint experience, so I decided to get a life jacket at the first opportunity instead of being picky.

The first opportunity turned out to be a ramshackle taco/life jacket/whatever else stand. They wanted $40 to rent a worn-out orange clip-in-the-front life jacket, to be returned the next day. I tried to find out what would happen if I didn't return it, but they were evasive on that point. Then I bought a taco, which turned out to be one somewhat undersized tortilla and one seriously undersized tortilla (silver dollar-sized), with about 6 bits of ground beef and a smear of vile-looking sauce (all this warmed up in a microwave). I was indignant and tried to protest to the seller, but my Spanish came out all wrong in my indignation (even including some French words), and the guy just laughed at me scornfully. (The guy manning this shady operation was a stout middle-aged Mexican guy with a distinct air of doing business with the wrong people, so I didn't rant for too long.)

After that, my companions revealed that they had been looking at the map to plan our route and had decided that the best strategy to avoid detection was to circle around--waaay around. The proposed route would include a trip through Big Bend, and we were going to take our giant SUV, so at least we could sleep inside it.

On that note, I think we decided we needed a real meal before undertaking the next leg of the trip, because the last thing I remember was a plate with some kind of chicken-fried-steak type meat atop a small mound of mashed potatoes. I was disconcerted because it wasn't the type of meal that fit in with the whole Texas/Mexico border theme, but I was also happy for something more substantial than the so-called "taco" from the stand.

packing and work stress

Right before I woke up I dreamed that I was on a trip with my husband and sister (maybe some other family members, but if so, not many). We were nearing the end of the trip and had to get our stuff packed up to go back home. We were in some kind of corporate conference-room-like place (middlebrow, not high-end) attached to a huge supermarket that was in turn in a mall. I guess we had been sleeping there, although there weren't any beds to be seen. My clothes had multiplied, and I had bought some things on the trip; there was no way I was going to get everything back in the suitcase, and I was stressed about it.

To further stress me, someone from my actual job came up and started telling me about the things she wanted me to buy at the supermarket. They were not necessary things at all, just things she happened to want, and I was irritated that she was asking for this when I was clearly busy (well, I was somewhat irritated that she was asking at all). I said, a bit too forcefully, "Yeah, yeah, yeah! I'll get it!" Then, alarmed by having shown my irritation so obviously, I tried to backpedal by adding, "I'm going to get one of those magnetic pads to put on the refrigerator too, so you guys can write down what you want on there."

Ugh.

purple shoes

I had another clothing dream last night. I was going to go somewhere with my parents, sister, and grandmother. Oddly, I think it was some sort of party or club--not the sort of event or place that my parents would be interested in (although the sense was that it was very innocent and kosher). I ended up picking out a white dress that was strangely reminiscent of one I had when I was 13, some purple shoes (chosen over some red ones that I actually have), and I was verifying that the grey cardigan I recently knit would look okay over the dress if it got cold. The weird thing was that, again, I was very happy with my choices and had already packed an overnight bag with things that I was sure were going to meet any unforeseen needs. I think it's weird that my subconscious is repeating these common dream themes, but with a different mood than normal. Nothing has happened in my life that I can think of that would make my subconscious less stressed or more confident than usual. I also wonder why I've been younger, skinnier, and prettier in these last few dreams.

Oh, and there were contact lenses in the dream too--the only angsty part. I took out my contacts (4 of them! - ?) and accidentally put all of them in the same side of the case. They clung together and I was worried that I wouldn't be able to get them back apart.

Lateness

Once again, I was running late to catch a flight and hadn't packed.

I was playing chess in the kitchen (I remember the board and it was completely improbable...) when I looked at the clock and saw that it was nearly 9:15. I realized that we should probably already be on our way to the airport, and I wasn't even dressed, let alone packed.

In the bathroom, my contacts were in what looked like a small, shallow, petri dish--and there were probably 10 of them. I knew that only two were my correct lenses, but figured that the others were old lenses that could work in a pinch. I got my right one in, but then couldn't find the left one. I tried on a couple that turned out to be soft lenses instead of hard ones; one was a gigantic blue lens that was way larger than my iris. At one point when I looked down at the petri dish, the contacts were all folding over on themselves, and some looked like they were made out of red rubber.

When I went to the bedroom, my suitcase was open but basically empty, and the closet was full of stuff that needed to be packed. I wasn't dressed, though, and I couldn't figure out what to wear on the plane. I tried on my new pair of striped gray slacks, but they looked funny. Then I realized I'd put them on over jeans. I took them off and decided to wear the jeans. I found an awesome sweater, a slim little scoop-neck, with wide horizontal stripes of navy and lime and narrow emerald ones, and half-length sleeves, which I thought would go perfectly with my new green trench coat.

The whole time I'd been dressing, I'd been trying frantically to do the math in my head on exactly how late we were. My flight was supposed to leave at 10:24, which meant I should be there not much later than 9:24. Then my sister said it would take 29 minutes to get to the airport! Dream math is not my forte, but I finally realized we should have left at 9:04. That's about when I woke up.

I'm halfway through my exams; apparently lateness to catch a flight is my subconscious' most accessible anxiety theme!

Meta

I was packing my suitcase at the last minute, and my mom was helping me cram things in. I was still going to leave some things at my parents', until I could pick them up at Christmas, including a pretty cool pair of running shoes.

As we were hurriedly trying to get everything in, I remember thinking, "No wonder I have dreams where I'm running late on my way to the airport, and packing at the last minute--this is the way my life is!"

how to have interesting dreams

Use your cell phone as an alarm clock, because that way you can press "snooze" an unlimited number of times and wake up just enough to think "this is a really great dream I'm having" and then go back to sleep and continue it.

The downside is that afterward you can't remember everything. I do remember that we were buying a really great old house in Italy. I was also, for some reason, babysitting some spoiled little kids. At another point, my husband and I were taking our dog for a run. He was driving his work truck, I was driving a car behind, and the dog was running between the two vehicles. It seemed like the perfect setup, and it didn't occur to me to wonder how the dog was managing to run so fast for so long. She seemed to enjoy it, but worked up a huge thirst and afterward jumped up on the kitchen counter of the Italian house to drink directly from the faucet.

Then, after it had been established that we were buying the house, we had to pack to get back to the airport, because we were going back to the U.S. for an unspecified period of time (the house was apparently a vacation home). One of my former roommates was there, a couple of random friends, and lots of objects from my past life were scattered all over the house, which made it difficult to hurriedly figure out what to put in the suitcase.

roller skates and russia

i was on a day-long date. he carried me around on roller skates. it took forever for us to get to this show that he was very excited to take me to see. we climbed up the bleachers and sat at the very top. it was here that i realized that the show would not start for another three hours and that i had forgotten all about my 11pm flight to russia. i apologized profusely as i told him he needed to take me back to my parents house immediately because i had not yet packed. he was irritated though he was trying to hide it. i began to worry about finding a warm enough coat to take with me and became frustrated with myself that i hadn't packed earlier. i also got nervous because i would be going to russia on a space shuttle and i really wanted to spend time with my family before i left. my date used a combination of roller skates and a car to get me back home. i felt bad that our date had not turned out as he had hoped and i rushed out of the car so as to avoid an awkward kiss.

Troubled waters

I was in my car when I started up the bridge, because I remember one of the workers holding out his hand for me to stop as I approached, and then motioning that I could continue. It looked like it was under construction, or perhaps just being built, like the new bike bridge on my commute to school.

By the time I got near the end of the bridge, though, things were definitely not finished, and I was on my own; I was now on my hands and knees crossing the widely-spaced rungs of a swinging bridge. As I was struggling with it, a guy passed me, and then he got the single-passenger circular orange transport-thing that would take him to the other side of the river. It was meant to travel on water, which seems odd given that we'd just crossed a bridge, but the logistical aspect that most concerned me at the time was how I would get across if he was taking the only transporter. He assured me that there was another on the other side, which satisfied me at the time (dream logic!).

When I crossed the bridge, I realized I needed to pack my suitcase before I got on the transporter. I knew I didn't have much to pack, but found myself packing and packing. Suddenly I realized I had two suitcases, both with clothes in them, that I needed to consolidate into one. About that time I became aware that I had been spending waaaaay too long on this, that I was at my aunt and uncle's house, and that I was about to be late for my flight. Thankfully my aunt agreed to drive me to the airport if I could cross the street and meet her on the other side--whatever that means.

I keep having these packing dreams; this is at least the third this week. First, I dreamed I was repacking my suitcase on a bus trip and missed the bus. Then a few days ago, I dreamed my family and I were going on a trip and that I was trying to grab things at the last minute, because I hadn't packed at all. There's the general anxiety of being late and about to miss my ride, but there's also the guilt about my tardiness and inability to get it together. I want some pleasant travel dreams!