Saturday, June 28, 2008

therapeutic screaming?

i was visiting the home of a blog friend who i've never met in person. it was her and her young son and then some other faceless people. me and her son and the faceless others were sitting at this small table with short legs - obviously a child's table. i was across from the boy.

the boy got upset, as children do, about something seemingly insignificant. he started banging his open hands on the table and screaming and crying (but without tears). i instinctively knew that his upset wasn't really about the insignificant issue - rather it was built up anger and sadness about the on-going divorce and custody battle his parents are embroiled in.

i watched him throw this tantrum and i saw the faceless others move in to try and shush and soothe him. but somehow i just knew what he needed and it was to really cry and scream and be allowed to be angry. and then i found myself joining in his tantrum. i started banging my hands on the table and screaming as well. my behavior shocked him for a moment and he stopped. he gave me an irritated and confused look. i said come on! don't stop! let's get this out! i'll do it with you... let's scream and cry! he looked at me like i was crazy and then he decided to take me up on it.

this time there were real tears on his face. and i noticed warm tears rolling down my cheeks. we screamed and cried together. and then we laughed.

1 comment:

CëRïSë said...

Maybe that should be my CBT prescription--screaming and tantrum-throwing, along with the crying!