Thursday, June 10, 2010

a first

readers, i had a dream first! last night i dreamed that i was myself... and then turned around and saw myself... outside of myself.

i don't remember any other details of the dream except this:

i had the contents of my purse spread out on a sofa. i was digging through it and trying to determine what i needed and what i didn't (i think this represents my current state of feeling cluttered in my life - my house is not tidy and my brain has a lot of cluttered thoughts at the moment about life-direction, what i want, that kind of thing). while i was digging through the mess and feeling a bit overwhelmed and ashamed of myself for the mess, i turned around to see myself sitting in a chair behind me!

the me who was sitting in the chair (we'll call her CM for chair me) had a peaceful and knowing smile on her face as she watched the me who was digging through my things (we'll call her DM for digging me). DM was startled and a little giddy to see CM, knowing that this was something that had never happened before - two MEs in the same room at the same time. DM wanted to call someone else to come in and witness this strange event but as soon as she attempted to call for someone, CM disappeared. DM turned back to her task at hand and thought about what a crazy/weird/cool thing had just happened and then decided to turn around again just to check if CM had come back - and sure enough, she had. CM was still pleasantly smiling and chill and this made DM relax and chill out as well. and then once again, CM disappeared.

i've never seen myself in a dream in that way before. i recall seeing myself in a mirror, and i'm pretty sure i've had dreams where i was outside of myself and watching myself (like watching a movie i was in, that sort of thing)... but never have i interacted with myself in a dream like that before. crazy.

i determined when i woke up that DM represented my thoughts and CM represented my awareness behind my thoughts. it seemed the most logical conclusion when i was still half asleep, and seemed even more logical when i was fully awake... so that's what i'm sticking with.

4 comments:

Leah said...

Whoa. That's seriously cool. I've never experienced anything like that before. I think it's a good sign that CM was happy and smiling and chill.

Maybe she was just there to remind you not to worry too much about clutter, but that things are going well behind the scenes.

CëRïSë said...

What a fantastic dream! I love the ones from which you wake up feeling affirmed and happy.

sprinkles said...

How weird! I once dreamed I was in a movie theater standing in front of the screen and when I turned around, I saw myself in the movie but I've never dreamed that I was myself and then turned around and saw myself...outside of myself.

This is actually a pretty cool dream!

strovska said...

wow, that's really trippy, for lack of a better word! and i love those dreams that make you feel better about your mental state (although i don't have them often). i think it's a good sign too that your "CM" was smiling and calm.